i am not going to go so far as to say this is a miracle, even though that is my instinct: my step-grandmother will not be coming. Just like that. They wanted to stay for two nights and my uncle (who they were riding with) cannot stay that long. Because of this she apparently decided not to come for dinner at all.
She had also wanted my mom to arrange for my grandpa to be able to go hunting with less than 24 hours notice. This was a request impossible for my mom to arrange. Whatever the real reason, she is not coming.
I am not calling this a miracle, because I don't think I am totally in the right to feel so much hatred toward her. Even so, it still feels like a miracle to me personally. The idea of her visit had been stressing me out to the point of having nightmares.
To top it all off last night it snowed.....Evan and I had hoped it would.
The snow makes everything look so beautiful and clean.
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4 comments:
I'm so glad you're having a happy Thanksgiving! :]
thanks, it actually turned out quite wonderful. my sister and i got to hang out with our cousins who are in their teens. It was great!
envious of the snow I am.
Happy happy about your hated person not showing up for the dinner.
This year for thanksgiving a new thing happened to me. I was able to very simply and easily decide to just not go to the dinner where the people I find toxic were going to be. It was the first time I was ever able to make that decision without enormous mental wrangling with myself, guilt, etc. etc. It was this amazingly freeing experience. I had *such* a better day because of it.
Ben--i know it sounds bad talking about hating someone, worse than that it IS bad. your comments help me realize exactly how terrible all of this is. what can i say? i am working on it.
sometimes it does seem more humane just to avoid certain people that have caused us pain or bring out the worst in us. i respect your choice and am glad it brought you happiness. i have done that a lot too but am occasionally forced to deal anyway. maybe the real miracle /mercy here is that i was sparred the occasion of doing further wrong and harm. if she had come here i may have caused everyone even more pain by not being able to control my own thoughts and words. for someone professing to be a christian that is pretty freaking pathetic.
we all do the best we can i guess... but rarely is it good enough and sometimes it is even evil. good luck in your quest to find a salary as a prophet and thanks for always making me think. peace to you
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